A Community Collaboration How Membership, Mentorship, and Meaning Enables You to Grow Personally and Professionally

Written by My Collaborative Team member, Randy Heller, PhD, LMHC, LMFT

In 2006, I began a journey that I had previously only dreamed about. I returned to pursue my doctoral degree after 15 years in private practice as a psychotherapist, working primarily in the field of divorce. While on this path, I had to determine how I could utilize my program of study to not only enhance my career, but make a significant difference in the field of Family Therapy, as well as the diverse populations who I served. In preparation for my dissertation work, I was enrolled in a Research class. It was my professor who said something that resonated within me and continues to this day. He said, “Research and study something you are passionate about...something that will make an impact. “

From that day forward I began my mission and trajectory to explore and understand the interdisciplinary team approach of Collaborative Family Law, and most specifically, the evolving role of the Mental Health Professional working in the process. Approximately 15 years later, this has been quite an expedition that continues to evolve and develop to this day.

I first became interested in this movement in approximately 2004. I was in “recovery” from an incredibly angry and litigious divorce. I was working as a Marriage and Family Therapist, and trying to do everything that I knew how to do to assist my clients who were not going to make it as a couple come to amicable terms. At that time, I knew nothing about Collaborative divorce.

I began to study everything that I could about Collaborative Practice. I decided to research and write my dissertation entitled, “The Role of the Mental Health Professional in Collaborative Family Law: What do they do?” It became more and more apparent to me that very few professionals in the mental health field, and especially, Marriage and Family Therapists who are on the front lines working with couples who through marriage counseling may decide to divorce, knew anything about Collaborative Practice. This presented me with a sense of urgency to educate, inform, and teach emerging therapists about a process that could help to restructure families and guide them to a better place.

After completing my Dissertation research, I thought, I must spread awareness about Collaborative Practice, throughout the mental health communities. I wrote a graduate course for emerging Marriage and Family Therapists called “Collaborative Divorce,” now beginning my seventh year teaching this course at Nova Southeastern University’s Department of Marriage and Family Therapy, in Davie Florida. Over a hundred students have been trained to date. This is a full semester, 3-hour weekly course. I am fortunate to have guest speakers from all professions in our Collaborative community lecture about their area of expertise in the process. Each week the students are required to research and write about different aspects of this method. The students’ final project involves working with a mock client family from their initial intake through the Collaborative Divorce Process, engaging in pre and de-briefs, developing agendas, drafting parenting plans, taking minutes, identifying needs, interests, and potential roadblocks and brainstorming options. The students videotape their meetings and then watch the videos as a

class and critique each other, demonstrating the ability to give and receive feedback. The end of the semester is followed by a formal Three Day Beginning and Advanced training that the students participate in by engaging in role plays with the trainers, volunteering, networking with and learning from community leaders and professionals. This project is a win-win for all involved, and out of that, emerged other opportunities...

At one of our local practice group meetings we had a guest speaker attend from Legal Aid. At that meeting the speaker stressed that unlike traditional litigation, Collaborative Family Law can uniquely address military specific issues in a more efficient and effective manner. At that moment of synergy, our Pro Bono Collaborative Family Law Clinic was conceived. Each year the students work in conjunction with a veteran family, Mission United, Collaborative Professionals from the Collaborative Family Law Professionals of South Florida, and myself to facilitate Pro Bono Collaborative cases. Here are some comments from the experiences of students:

Collaborative Divorce drew me immediately by name. Two words I could rarely imagine together. All I knew about is how painful, exhausting, and traumatic divorce is. Valuable and practical knowledge as a future family therapist. Shir Bensusan, Masters Student, Marriage and Family Therapy, Nova Southeastern University Graduate, Admnistrator and Co- Facilitator, Collaborative Probono Project

In addition to benefiting the students who are the next generation of Collaborative professionals, participating in these probono matters also contributes greatly to the mentorship of newly trained by experienced Collaborative professionals. In doing this work, not only do participants develop their Collaborative skills, but they also develop significant and trusted relationships with one another that enable them to build their practices while doing giving back and good for the community. The year I began working on this probono project, I had many of the attorneys I worked with on these matters subsequently recommending me to work on other matters (where I got paid!).  

Jeffrey Wasserman, Esq., a reformed well-known South Florida litigator writes:

I had the distinct pleasure of representing a Veteran in a Collaborative Divorce referred to me by Dr. Heller and her team of graduate students through the Mission United Program. The students and Dr. Heller conducted the initial intake, identified the issues to be resolved, and referred the clients. The case was conducted remotely with the wife, while the team worked with the husband in person. At the final hearing, my client informed me and Dr. Heller he “knew that he could now move forward in his life.”

Having served during Vietnam, I feel an obligation to assist fellow Veterans in need of legal representation with their divorce. The overwhelming appreciation shown by my client at the conclusion of his Final Hearing made it more than worthwhile.

This course and community project is only the beginning for these students, and I know they will continue to go on to do great things. Whether disseminating information about the Collaborative Divorce Process through direct contact with couples, as a referral source for other clinicians who specialize in working with divorcing families, or providing it to their local clergy, community and professional organizations, these students are now informed about a process, equipped with skills, knowledge and an area of expertise they can provide to people who otherwise may not know where to turn. They are now some of our best referral sources! As I said, a “win/win” opportunity for all involved.

Where do I begin? How to develop your Probono Projects:

• Find a population in need in your community and give a presentation on the Collaborative Process;
• Engage student interns and professionals in your practice groups to participate and mentor. It is a good idea to pair up experienced and new professionals to work together on these matters;
• There is no need to reinvent the wheel. Connect with someone who is already doing this work,  and get guidance, maps, and forms.
• Go out and do it!

For additional information, contact me at [email protected]