Written by My Collaborative Team co-founder, Carolann Mazza, Esq.

A dear friend, who is 94 years old, recently fell and broke her hip. Her daughter, the only family that lived near her, was in Europe. As her daughter worked to get home sooner than she had originally planned, I stepped in as a surrogate, accompanying my friend to the hospital and participating as much as the hospital would allow (which, as the delta covid variant causes restrictions to be put back into place in hospitals around the country, ended up being quite a bit).

My friend was frightened, to say the least. She was in a strange place with strangers poking and prodding. She could not leave, walk, or wait for her daughter to return from Europe to get medical care. I received many phone calls from the hospital asking me to come and comfort her because she was so anxious. 

The reality was that my friend was in broadcast mode and was not receiving any information. No matter how much the medical staff tried to reason with her or cajole her into relaxing, she wasn’t hearing. She wasn’t receiving. She was broadcasting. I sat with her and let her broadcast. After a while, she calmed down and was ready to receive. It took patience to allow her to go through her process. 

Often our Collaborative divorce clients are in broadcast mode, not receiving any of the information we are imparting. No matter how reasonable or logical the information we are providing is, they are not receiving it. What do we do in that case? How can we support them while they are in their broadcast mode and still guide and advise them?

This is where allowing our clients their process comes in. Listen, hear, let them broadcast. Maybe, at the appropriate time, ask questions. Allow them their process. Eventually, they will begin to receive.